I don’t know if I mentioned it yet, but I don’t have fangs. Not retractable, not proudly displayed, not at all. I have seen them though. When I was turned, a few of them did have them out and they were certainly unmistakable. I didn’t think much of it though. I just assumed they had implants or prosthetics. That kind of thing is easy to obtain these days, even if you live in the underground and don’t want the world to know of your alterations. My best guess says the olden days were filled with stabbings from cooking forks. Like modern day barbecue tools. Two holes drained faster than one and it happened to look kind of like fangs from an animal or something so the locals didn’t have reason to launch a witch hunt every time a villager surfaced with a snake bite on his neck. Just my guess though. I wasn’t there so who can tell?
There’s actually a lot about the portrayal of the vampire that I question. Where did anyone get the idea they’re rich and live in castles? I’ve never heard of a mysterious castle with an immortal occupant. Believe me when I say I’ve seen every castle related history show ever made. People know of these things these days. All castles are plotted and researched. Did they uncover the truth about some and manage to get killed before reporting it to the world? Doubt it. Were they bought off? Every one of them? Like every historian is some money hungry jerk who can be paid to hide the truth? No, I bet the reality is no vampire in history has managed to figure out how to stash a fortune while preventing people from noticing they never get older. Are there vampires with bank accounts? Do they move them around every few decades? I want to know cause I will probably have to do it myself some day… assuming I don’t get lucky and find out how to end this tragic sewage bag of a life I live.
I guess you can manage to keep creating identities for yourself. I’ve seen the Shawshank Redemption. He makes up a human and assumes his life after busting out of prison. Of course, that was in like the 1960’s or so. These days you’d think the system would be harder to fool. If not, wouldn’t all criminals just keep inventing new identities for themselves? I know, not very astute for someone that’s seen every show related to fraud, CSI, and crime since the beginning of television. I just assume the facts aren’t getting to me. Not to be a conspiracy theorist or anything, but there has to be an answer to all the holes I find in my own existence.